By the way, things are pretty much over between me and The Bartender. He seemed fine with the no-sex thing at first, but then he seemed to get rather frustrated when he realized that this meant we would not be having sex. He hasn't called me yet. I haven't called him either. I'm using the excuse that I initiated the last contact between us, so he has to do it this time. I don't want to be one of those annoying people that keeps bugging people that want nothing to do with them. Sometimes I suspect that my friends are all people who are just too nice to say no. I sometimes think "If I stopped calling everyone, how long would it be before any of them noticed?" but I don't want to do that, because I am very needy, and I don't really want to know if my friends are real friends. I'm just thankful that they tolerate me.

But not with the bartender. Relationships are hard work, and very exhausting. If he wants me, he can have me, but I'm not making any especial effort to make it happen.