Two Vivid Dreams

Last night I had two dreams which can be included in larger catergories of dreams that I often have: a dream about my father, and a dream about a hypothetical fantasy/sci-fi world.

My father: We were living in a wooded suburb. I was playing video games. I was afraid that my father was going to come home and be drunk. He came home, and indeed he was drunk. He gave me ownership of a house not far from his own. I ran to my house frantically, desperately praying that he would not follow me. When I got there I locked all the doors. I was afraid that he would have a key, and that he would be able to unlock the doors; fortunately, all the doors had deadbolts and chain locks that couldn't be accessed from outside. As I locked the front door, I was terrified that he would enter in by the back. When I got to the back door (off the kitchen) and finally got it locked, I felt the greatest relief. I felt very safe for a moment. Then I realized that he might be trying to get in through a window, so, much more calmly, I set about locking the window and closing all the shades. I knew that once I did that I would feel greatly secure.

This dream was scary, but it was much more preferable to the ones where he is chasing me with a chainsaw or an ax (re: The Shining), 'cause then locking the doors is no help at all; you just have to keep running. It still amazes me just how much my relationship with my father has impacted my life, and how much I fear and hate him.

Fantasy Dream: I personally was not in this dream. It took place in a utopian society, where the technology was environmentally clean, and the people dressed like they were out of Xena or something like that. A happy people, overall, but for some reason they were having a civil war. It was difficult, because very tiny floating vehicles were trying to fight these huge monoliths. However, the people with the tiny ships built their own huge monolith (re: Big O) and just totally wiped out the other side. After this happened peace was restored, and the rest of the story became clear. It seems that the people of this race live forever, or at least a very long time. As they age they get very big, like huge giants if they have been alive for a very long time, and if they meet certain conditions; you can only become giant if you have a lot of contact with a giant, first visually, and eventually a patronage from that giant. The problem is that the smaller people breed just as fast as humans, and so great population problems were arising. This caused practical problems of feeding and such, but there was also the problem of making it very difficult for people to have any contact with the giants, and thus the race was staying small and stagnant. They needed to kill off some of the long-lived giants, especially the ones which had become irrelevent to society. The ones they killed off were like these giant war-like statues. The ones that lived were much more human seeming; one that I saw was an old bearded white guy (re: Gandalf in Lord of the Rings), with a large staff and a rainbow headscarf. He was not a perfect person, but he was alot better than the ones that died off. Alot of the smaller guys were killed off in the war too, so things were much easier for everyone, and one small woman was so excited, saying "I can see him! I can see him! I can finally see him!" He looked surprised at being able to be seen.

This dream seems to be symbolic, certainly. Alot of the over-riding principles of my life have become irrelevent, and I'm stagnating. I need to make way for smaller, less developed ideas to eventually gain strength and power so that they can eventually have more significance and power in my life, and I need them to be connected only to those already established principles that are positive, not destructive. Also, I need to be more selective about which of my smaller ideas I keep around, and which I let die out.