I'm thinking of acting out today, in an unsafe way. I don't really want to do it, but I do want to get off. Actually, I just want to be social, and I can't think of any other way to do that. If I just went out and tried to talk to people, than I believe that the only people who would want to talk to me anyway would be people who want to have sex with me, like that would be the only motivation that they would have. So why not just cut out the middle man and just go cruising?

I don't understand how people make friends. I mean, I have a couple of friends, but I don't understand how I got them, and I don't really know how I'm supposed to go about getting more of them. I mean, ideally I would have some sort of pleasurable social interaction every day, but I can't rely on the same three people, over and over again, to give it to me. I just need to have more friends.