I surprised myself the other day. I was talking to some guy, some Native American trucker looking guy, when I was out and about. He was gay, and of course I was gay, and we were flirting somewhat (alright, alright...we were having anonymous sex down by the river). After we had been going at it for awhile, what with the oral sex and mutual masturbation and such, he was all like "So...you have an 'other half'?" I was all like "Huh?" He got a little flustered then, and forced himself to say "I mean, are you seeing someone?"

Here's the surprising part: what immediately came out of my mouth was "Pshaw! Of course not! The last thing I need is some boyfriend hanging around, cramping my style and telling me what to do." He got this bemused look on his face, and said "Yeah, that's true," and that was the end of that line of conversation.

What was so surprising about my statement though, was that even though I just said it to avoid being pursued by this guy in particular, I think I actually kind of meant it, like in a general sense. My official stance on the subject of having a boyfriend is that it's a nice idea, and if I met someone who I was in to I would be more than happy to be with them. The reality, however, is that when I imagine being part of couple I get...nervous? Tense, definitely. And irritated. Oppressed. Restricted. Trapped.