S'been a little while since I blogged...I've been so preoccupied with writing for my classes. Honestly, I'm not really having so much fun with it anymore...it's becoming too much of a struggle. I don't like struggles. I want everything to be easy and enjoyable. If something is difficult, then it's not worth doing, I say. I know that's not entirely true...but when something goes against the grain of your whole personality, and every step is a forced effort, than you have to wonder if what you're doing is reallly the right thing for you. Unfortunately, now matter how much something sucks, there's allways a part of me that's still enjoying it, so I can never say that something is just pure suck, and therefore not the right thing for me to be doing.

I've been masturbating like crazy lately. My roomate gave me the password for his computer (which shows that he does trust me, at least a little bit) so I've had lots of private time to jerk off to porn. Consequently, I kind of hurt myself a little bit, rubbing the skin off of my foreskin, down at the bottom, where my thumb holds and grinds. I guess I'm not too ashamed about this. The other two or three times that this happened I stopped jerking off the second I realized what happened, and didn't do it again until I was healed. This time I just went right along doing what I was doing, barely giving the pain a second thought. I suppose this should worry me, but actually I feel pretty blase about it. Actually, I feel pretty blase about my whole addiction right now.

I'm getting along pretty good with my room mate. I think were both starting to understand each other pretty well. I for one feel much less threatened by his intellect and his desire to regulate the lives of others than I did before. He, for his part, is being better about respecting my boundaries and not trying to regulate my life in any way, which I believe is difficult for him, and so I really respect him for that. I think that him having his ADHD medicine back(which he was out of when I first moved in) is part of why he seems more under control than he was before.